Some thoughts

Today is going to be a good day and a slightly hard day.

I get to spend most of the day with Matthew. We are going to finally check out Avatar 3D and as much fun as that is going to be, I am going to miss my "mini mister".

Last night after surprising my mom at her office, she somehow tricked me into leaving Sam at her house over night. She's sly like that. The first few thoughts that came to mind were "yes, so much sleep" and "I can actually get things done tomorrow". But as I started to leave Grandma and Grandads house a little ping of sadness struck my stomach.

I have not had a night without Sam since the NICU.

Thinking back on those nights still brings tears to my eyes. It was so hard to go home without my new baby, but the nurses assured me that he would be fine and that I needed the rest.

Last night, when I got home and didn't have to quietly unsnap Sam from his car seat, the same security (more actually) came over me. He would be fine, and I needed the rest.

And rest we did. Matt and I found it funny to be as loud as possible while we got ready for bed since we were not going to be waking any sleeping baby. Why is it that sometimes when we are without the kid that we act like kids ourselves? We are pretty silly sometimes.

This morning we laid in bed for as long as possible, and said our goodbyes as Matt headed to work for a little bit. And yes, I called my parents to see how Sam did over night. I'm surprised my mom didn't call me first to see if I was OK over night.

Now I will get things done that have been rotting away on my to do list. Returns, chores, shopping and editing. I bet I can do it all.

But I am so missing this face.