To the butt head who picked up my brand new Kindle fire at Sea Tac airport,
I loathe you. Why, when you found it under the pleather airport seats, didn't you have the decency to turn it in to the lost and found?
It makes me so angry to think of you reading books and watching movies on MY electronic device. Poo on you and your greasy hair and bad skin. At least that's what I imagine a horrible person like you would look like.
And some how I know you're male. Women are too classy to steal something that doesn't belong to them.
Example: See how she's sitting all proper and pretty? Yeah, not a thief.