Weekend woes

During our adoption process we have had a few disappointments and hard lessons. But this weekend was by far the hardest experience we have had in our journey so far.

(The sky on Friday night)

Friday morning we got the call that we have been waiting for. 

A birthmother had given birth the night before and we had been chosen to adopt TWIN boys.

Elated, we prepared for our trip to Colorado to pick up and bring home the tiny babies. Car seats, preemie clothes, diapers, formula and even names. We were ready for our dreams to finally be coming true.

Then the birthmother stopped answering her phone. 

We waited around all day Saturday hoping for a call. Nothing. 

Our adoption agent had left numerous messages but none had been returned. 

Discouragement set in. 

Still, we waited all night. 

Today we got the call that we were fearing, but expecting. The birthmother had been discharged and had taken the boys home with her. 

We are heartbroken. Frustrated. Tired. Sad. 

Its been a tough day. 

I returned all of the baby items this afternoon hoping it would be therapeutic, a way to put an end to this chapter. I can't say it helped, but it needed to be done. 

Then we took Sam out to the Children's Museum to get our minds off of things but there were babies and bellies everywhere. At least Sam had fun. 

We will heal. Hopefully those boys will be cared for as well as we would have. We will try again. I will continue to pine for little babies. Matt will continue to assure me that it will happen one day. Sam will go on calling his dogs his brother and sister. 

For now, anyway. 

Flooring

Uh! Don't you just hate it when 2 dogs, a cat and an alligator pee on the carpet in your living room? 

Well we do. 

So we finally replaced our downstairs carpet with wood floors. 

It was a ton of work but so worth it. We went with a dark bamboo since it's the hardest material we could afford. It took us a few weeks but it's finally complete and we couldn't be happier with the result. (or the lack of urine smell!)

We have been updating a few of the other rooms as well. Our bedroom went from being cramped and all turquoise to a nice light brown and green room.

Then of course when Sam turned 3 we had to upgrade him to a new bed and layout in his "big boy" room. He requested a giraffe theme, and we agreed. 

 His room is so long and skinny that it was really difficult to find a way to fit all his things in there. We did what we could with the small space.

We have a ton more projects we are planning on tackling very soon. First to come is our entry way where we tore out a closet and some walls to install a nice stair banister. We also hope to add some much needed lighting and a new deck. Its nice having a handy husband around :)

Year in Instagram

So long, 2012

This was by far the hardest year we have ever had to endure. Between losing Jan, Cory's head injury, saying goodbye to childhood pets and struggling with adoption and fertility issues, we are ready for a better year.

We had some good times, too. Disneyland,  Sam starting school, Matt's graduation,  and a few family trips around the PNW kept us somewhat sane.

2013 is starting off strong with some exciting changes.

Here's to hoping this will be a sign of more good things to come.